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Binge Eating from mother to child


Question
I am almost 31 years old and I have been suffering with ED since I was 16.  It started with anorexia, then bulemia and binge eating/bulemia and now an obsession with food.  I have a 2 year old daughter and a 7 month old son.  I am getting treatment and clearly need help.  My biggest concern is my daughter.  She is a healthy size (solid but not overweight) and clearly obsessed with food.  She eats more than many adults.  She clearly doesn't know how to stop herself and is constantly talking about food, playing with food.. I could go on and on.  I don't want to restrict her but she will eat and eat and eat.  She seems to have an oral fixation.  She even begs to brush her teeth and asks for milk and juice all day too. Friends and family have clearly noticed her obsession.  She is way more interested in food than play. I feel so much guilt and I'm fearful that our son is going to inherit this awful disease too.  I am meeting with her pediatrician and I'm going to be open and honest about my problems.  I can't focus on anything at all.  I'm going to set up an appointment with a cognitive behaviorist.  Do you have any advice?  Thank you!

Answer
You're right about the tendency toward eating disorders to run in families, and it usually starts as a behavior like you describe, picked up from the parent. Even when the parent thinks they've hidden their own problem well, the child still knows.
 Oddly, my ed's were from my father and not any of the females in my family. None of them! My dad dieted and binged constantly and perhaps more damaging was his watching what I ate even more than he watched what HE ate.
 To further complicate the issue, e.d.'s are nearly always psychological disorders.  Not just 'behavior' problems, but a hard wired tendency toward OCD and other things like alcoholism, drug abuse, etc.. The 'addiction' to food is no less real than an addiction to drugs/alcohol.
 I'm not sure that a cognitive behaviorist will be as much helpful as you may think. I'd opt for a psychological counselor who understands addictions, addictive behavior  and most especially e.d.'s
 It should be a family involvement of course.  All of you learning how to put food in perspective. It's enjoyable and it should be! However, it shouldn't be the focus of a day.  
 To everyone out there who has never had an e.d., this sounds far too easy. To those of us who constantly struggle to keep food where it belongs on our priorities list of 'things to do' - it's an effort that's huge!

Let me know how you all do ok?

Take a look at my site if you want to find out more about how I "did it" (and continue to win that daily battle)
  www.GetTheReal.info (click on the scales)  
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