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Concerned for a friend


Question
Hello, I'm concerned for my friend. He's 16 years old. Saying his current diet is awful is a gross, gross understatement. I've told him multiple times, as have many others, that he needs to eat healther, even if just a bit. He tends to consume nothing (almost literally) but sugar and caffeine. If this weren't bad enough, he also undereats as of late. His bad dietary habits (at least with the type of food) have been going on for a year or two now. Before then, when his family was concerned with his little brother's allergies, he ate almost nothing but healthy food. He wouldn't even eat the birthday cake at my party one year. Last year (or semester at least, as I was only in his lunch for one semester) he still ate terribly, but he was eating more. He gets little to no exercise, minimal amounts of water, and only sleeps when he feels he really needs to. Sometimes he'll sleep every other day, but if he goes to sleep (if it's not just whenever he's tired) it tends to be from very early in the morning to very late in the afternoon or early in the evening. He spends the vast majority of his time inside with electronics, and yet gains absolutely no weight. From what I've seen, none of this really impairs his thought process at all, either. He gets sick about as often as any other individual. Essentially, he seems to be in perfect health while his diet, exercise, and sleeping habits should prove otherwise. I would greatly appreciate your thoughts on this, and must apologize for how unorganized my thoughts are.
Thank you for your time,
-Zack

Answer
Dear Zack,

I can certainly appreciate your concern for your friend.  I understand how difficult it is to sit by and watch someone engage in unhealthy, or even dangerous habits.  The body does amazing things to compensate for whatever we do to it, so he may not see any affects even with poor diet and sleeping habits.  It's fairly common for teenagers to continue with these habits well into their 20's and I know of many individuals who have subsisted on basically one or two foods alone (like froot loops and ramen noodles) for years!

Unfortunately, there is nothing we can do to change other people, whether it's their habits or their personality :)  It's great to let him know you are concerned and you care about him, but beyond that, as a wise person once advised me, "When you are working harder on the problem that the person with the problem is, it's time to back off".
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